MIL Chronicles: T minus 8 days
Big: (to me) Linda brought me baked ziti today
Me: oh that's nice. Has Gail brought cookies again?
These are clients of his.
MIL: oh STEVEN you eat the stuff they bring you?!
Me: oh yeah. He has quite a little network going. He's only wearing the cologne I hate at work and his harem is bringing food.
Big: *head thrown back laughing* shut up
Me: yeah I shouldn't even cook for him, I should let them
MIL: I can't believe you eat that shit they bring you! You don't know what their kitchen looks like. It's probably dirty as shit!
(She is the only good cook on the planet and the only one who has a clean kitchen. That's the story. Here comes the hook.)
Big: mother these women are my friends. I've been to Gail's house! Deb and I helped her when she had her hip replacement. I'm not worried about those kitchens
MIL: you don't know they could have cats that jump all over the counters and there could be feathers in the food. Ack! No.
Big: (to me, laughing) this one over here had cats with feathers! Mother, cats have fur not feathers.
MIL: you know what I mean
Big: no, most of the time I really don't.
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